“To not hurt others.”

D,

We do not have to be heroes to not hurt others. It is the most basic part of acceptable behavior. It is the kindness of being human and alive and having a spirit that dwells in the light. As you grow up, and I hope it is not in the toxicity or abuse that we grew in, you will learn that the darkness calls all of us to be our other side; the base of the fallen soul.

We must talk about this openly, men frequently hurt women. There are things in memory and mind that are too disgraceful to face. We must look at it square in the face. The monster is us, not you. The monster is the shadow in us, and the shadow is us, but it does not have to be you. We are unlearning what you must never learn. We are learning to listen, to take account and to do better. It is not enough that we do not do the vilest things on record. That we condone it makes us criminal, that we support the monster makes us culpable and that we do not speak against it makes us cowards.

None of this, dear son, should be your burden. Grow steadily in the light. The legacy of indulgence, of entitlement and of indifference should not be your reality. The weight of being different or speaking out and reforming these relationships should not be yours either. I hope simply that you remember this: do not hurt others, be kind and attempt to live in the light.