“Dealing with Grief.”

 

H,

 

I keep running away from my grief. I do not want to process it. Of course, I have the usual line I sell to myself: life on earth is temporal and the life to come is more important. I believe this and I know this is true. Yet, when I say it in this tone, I do not mean the eventual resolution of things. I am not trying to resolve anything. I am on the run.

 

Sometimes, when I am driving, I talk to the empty seat next to me. It is after some memory has bubbled up and I have something to say to someone who is not here anymore. It is the only way I deal with grief, and for a few moments, I am aware of them and I think of them and there is an eternal line running through it. I am smiling more than I am crying.

 

I am not sure there is one way to deal with grief. There are probably a thousand ways. We do not want to think of this. We are wiser when grief is happening to someone else. This wisdom, actually, is mostly the art of saying stupid things. In every instance, our grief and the grief of others, there is nothing better to do than give time and space and love. To ourselves, and to others.